In parenting, there’s no script—no instruction manual for the heartbreaks we’ll face or the resilience we’ll need. In the latest episode of The Dadsnet Podcast, Chesney Hawkes opens up about one of the hardest chapters of his life as a father—a chapter marked by loss, grief, and a desperate effort to hold his family together.
“We lost someone very close to our family—a young woman who was like a big sister to my kids. When she took her own life, it completely broke us.”
It was 2016. Chesney and his family were living in LA. His eldest son was 15. His youngest, barely into adolescence. In one gut-wrenching moment, everything changed.
“It was like ground zero. There was who we were before, and who we were after.”
As dads, we often slip into problem-solver mode. Fix it. Steady the ship. Keep going. Chesney did the same. But as he recalls in the podcast, that instinct often came at a cost—his own grief went unspoken.
“I was trying to keep everyone else afloat. But I hadn’t processed it myself.”
It’s a theme many dads in our community will recognise. The unspoken pressure to “stay strong,” to shield our families from the emotional fallout. But Chesney’s honesty offers something powerful: a reminder that vulnerability isn’t a failure of fatherhood—it’s a strength.
In time, he began to talk to his kids. Openly. Gently. Authentically. About what had happened. About what it meant. And, perhaps most significantly, about how grief never really disappears—it just changes shape.
“We have to raise a generation of kids who can talk about their feelings. That’s the legacy I want to leave.”
Whether he’s on stage, behind a mic, or helping his son troubleshoot a missing guitar pedal before a gig, Chesney is proof that showing up as a dad isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being real.
