Finn’s feet are now touching the end of his bedside crib. Not every night, but often enough that he wakes himself up kicking it, which at half four in the morning in a Dundee November is pure misery for all three of us.
So the cot conversation has started in our house. And because cots are not cheap, and because we’re still getting used to life on one wage plus Eilidh’s maternity pay, the obvious move was second hand. One of Eilidh’s pals from school offered us her old cot bed, mattress and all. Same week, I found a cracking looking one on Marketplace for about the price of a takeaway.
Nobody told me there was a whole checklist for this. (I found out at 2am, obviously, scrolling on my phone with Finn asleep on my chest.)
It turns out the timing was good, too. A Netmums piece this week had experts from the pram brand Silver Cross going through which baby kit is fine to buy used and which you should think twice about. Bear in mind Silver Cross sells new cots, so I went and checked what the safe sleep charity, The Lullaby Trust, actually says. Here’s what I learned, and what we did.
The mattress is the bit to get right
This is the one that surprised me. The Lullaby Trust generally advises a new mattress for each baby, because research suggests using a second hand mattress from outside your own family home increases the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
I’d honestly assumed the mattress was the least important part. It’s a foam rectangle. Shows what I know.
They’re realistic about it, mind. Not everybody can buy new, and they say so. If you do use a second hand one, they say it should:
- have a well fitting, completely waterproof cover
- have no rips or tears
- be in good condition, with no water damage
- be firm and flat, with no sagging
- fit the cot or Moses basket properly, with no gaps
- have a fire resistant label on it
On firmness, their mattress and bedding page says a baby’s head should sink no more than a few millimetres. No raised or cushioned edges either. I pressed the Marketplace one with my hand in the seller’s hallway like I was testing a melon, and it had a proper dip in the middle where the last wean had obviously slept for a couple of years. That one was a no.
The cot itself
The frame is a different story. A used cot can be absolutely fine, as long as it’s in one piece and does what it’s meant to. The Lullaby Trust’s quick checklist is dead simple:
- Instructions. Get hold of them. Most makers have them as a download on their website, so search the make and model.
- Safety standard. Cots and travel cots should meet BS EN 716. Cot mattresses have their own standard, BS EN 16890. It’s usually on a label or in the listing.
- Recalls. Check it’s not been recalled on GOV.UK’s product safety alerts and recalls page.
- All there. No broken or missing parts. A cot with a bag of mystery screws is not a cot, it’s a puzzle.
Being a sparky, I can’t help checking how things are put together, so I got down on the floor with the torch on my phone. On the cot bed from Eilidh’s pal, every slat was solid, the base sat level and the bolts all matched. I found the instructions online in about two minutes. One bit of teething damage on the top rail, which the Silver Cross folk mention as a common one, along with wear from being converted into a toddler bed and back. Ours was cosmetic, no splinters, nothing loose.
The other thing the charity flags, which I’d never have thought of: don’t use anything that’s been adapted or “upcycled”. So no cot that’s had a side taken off to bolt it to an adult bed, and nothing with gems, fur or wee decorations stuck on. Some of the painted ones on Marketplace look lovely. Is that just me? Apparently that’s exactly the sort of thing to swerve.
They also say second hand stuff should ideally come from a smoke free and pet free home, because both affect how clean it really is. That’s an easy question to ask before you drive across town.
Where the cot goes (for now)
This is the bit I keep reminding myself about. Finn’s getting a cot, not his own room. The Lullaby Trust advises keeping babies in the same room as you for at least the first six months, day and night, so the cot bed is going in our room, squeezed in next to the wardrobe.
Their advice is to keep it away from radiators, direct sunlight and blind cords. In our flat that ruled out the obvious spot under the window, which has both a radiator and a blind. Cue me and Eilidh shuffling furniture at nine at night like a pair of removal men who’d lost the van.
And nothing in it but Finn. Firm sheet tucked in properly or a sleeping bag, feet at the foot of the cot, no pillows, no bumpers, no teddies. Same rules as the crib, just more room for him to wriggle.
The rest of the baby kit
While I was reading up I went down the rabbit hole on everything else we’ve been handed down or might buy used. Quick version of what I found:
- Car seats. Both the Silver Cross experts and The Lullaby Trust say don’t use a second hand one, even from family. You can’t always tell if it’s been in a crash, and the damage isn’t always visible. We bought ours new, and I’m glad.
- Prams and pushchairs. Fair game second hand, according to Silver Cross, as long as the brakes, harness, wheels, frame and folding all work, and nothing’s missing. Push it about, fold it, unfold it, try the brake on a slope.
- Nursery furniture. Fine if it’s clean, undamaged and complete. Put it together with the right fittings and fix drawers and wardrobes to the wall so they can’t tip over once the wee one starts pulling himself up on things. (Finn’s not there yet. Give him a few months.)
- Moses baskets and bedside cribs. Same checks as a cot. Since 2020, bedside cribs should meet the newer standard, BS EN 1130:2019, so it’s worth checking for that, especially on an older one.
What we did
We took the cot bed from Eilidh’s pal and said thanks very much. We passed on her mattress, not because there was anything obviously wrong with it, but because it had been used by another family’s baby and we could afford a new one if we were sensible about it. So I bought a new, plain, firm one with a waterproof cover. Nothing fancy. It’s for a baby who currently thinks his own foot is the best toy ever made.
The Marketplace one I left, sagging mattress and all. The seller was nice about it.
If money’s really tight, and it is for loads of families just now, The Lullaby Trust points to baby banks. They’re like food banks but for baby essentials, and you can find your nearest one through the Baby Bank Alliance. Some take referrals from your health visitor or midwife, and some let you get in touch yourself.
Anyway. The cot’s built, it’s in the right place, and the mattress fits with no gaps. I checked with my fingers round all four sides, twice, which Eilidh found very funny.
Finn slept in it for an hour on Saturday afternoon. Then woke up, looked at the bars, and roared. I’m counting it as a start.
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